Sensei and Sensibility
Wednesday, November 27, 2002
The Real Reason For Procrastinating
I`ve finally figured it out.
Yesterday, I was told that I had to meet with the Superintendant of the Board of Education to discuss my leave this Christmas (which, incidentally, starts next Saturday). I asked why, as I had already passed along my flight information, and we had had meetings and discussions about it back in August when I booked the ticket. I was assured that it was just a formality, that he just wanted a photocopy of my itinerary, and as such, I was to go on my own without a translator (the Superintendant`s English is pretty good as he was an English teacher before this. However, this does not mean that he is capable of complicated conversations in English). So, I stopped fretting and went for my meeting.
I arrive, sit down, and am poured coffee. It soon became obvious to me that this meeting was about more than just my Christmas vacation (as I had expected and made sure to double check on - alas, someone was not being completely honest with me. This seems to be becoming a regular occurrence here). So, there I was, faced with the prospect of having a complicated conversation with the man who is the one who can make or break my experience here, as he is THE BIG BOSS. There was no room for screwing up.
Immediately, he launches into his question: "Can you change your air ticket?" I tried really hard not to flip out on him (did I mention that I leave next week?) and calmy pointed to the line that said that it was, indeed, a fixed ticket so no, I could not change it. It turns out that they are upset that I am taking time off when classes are in session (the holidays here are only around New Year`s) and they want to know why (they already know why!). I calmly explained ONCE AGAIN that it is my mom`s 60th birthday on the 8th of December, and since all my family is coming from Germany for that, I wanted to be there. I am set to arrive the day before her birthday. I am coming back the day after Christmas. I explained that Christmas is the most important holiday for me and for many Canadians (being the 8th ALT, they should know this already, and they admit that they do). I was trying to be firm but calm. I did not understand why it was suddenly a problem when we already had 3 weeks of meetings about this issue in August/September and they already decided that I could go, at which point I booked my ticket.
This issue was dropped for the time being. Next I was informed that my vacation days are screwed up. My principal (the one who approves vacation time) told me last year that I was to count my vacation days from January to December. Because I started in August, this would have meant that I had a lot of vacation time to use before the upcoming January. I questioned this, knowing it sounded too good to be true. I was told by my principal that they did this to ensure that the ALT would get a nice, long Christmas holiday, and that that was to help him/her get over homesickness. I understood this logic and gratefully accepted the offer. Now, I was being told that this was incorrect, and that my vacation days are to be calculated from August to July. So, it seems that I was to be reprimanded again, and then a mad struggle to figure out how much vacation I have used ensued.It turned out that I still had 6 days of vacation left over from last year.
Next I was told that they will allow me to use those 6 days this year, thus enabling me to have enough time off to go home this Christmas. Phew. That was solved, but the guy still didn`t look too happy. Meanwhile, I was getting a bit upset (though keeping it in because it would be rude to express my frustration) because I was so careful to check and count and confirm everything with all the necessary people - yet here I was, finding out that no one is communicating with each other (no small surprise to me - it is fairly easy to tell that the Superintendant and the Principal DO NOT get along.)
But wait, it`s not over!
I am then scolded for not telling them that I was lonely and bored being the only ALT left in my area this summer. I am told that they would have given me 2 extra weeks (secretly - not vacation days, so not written in my contract, so not communicated to me beforehand) to go travel around Asia - something that they`ve given all the other ALT`s. I tried calmly to tell this man that after I was told that I had to use 5 days of vacation to renew my passport and get my driver`s licence, I thought that it was futile to even try to ask to get time off to go home. I was told that this is not the case. Getting a passport (which I need in order to be here) and a driver`s licence (which I need to travel between schools) requires vacation days, but backpacking around Asia does not. I was then informed that they will give me these two weeks extra next year to go home. Oddly, it sounded like it was a great concession - not because it is extra vacation time, but because that two weeks is supposed to be used to go sit on a beach in Thailand instead of visiting one`s loved ones. I was confused on this point, but thought it was wiser to just drop it.
Still, it`s not over...
I was then asked for a full report of all the overtime I`ve put in recently. The hours amounted to 12 days of extra work. This is actually not an accurate calculation of all the overtime I`ve put in lately - they wouldn`t accept the time I spent on the weekends at my Elementary Schools` sports days, or the weekend where I looked after the visiting teachers from Canada (touring them around town and the area, taking them to Kyoto - showing them a good time so that they wouldn`t have to sit in their hotel high up in the mountains with no facilities all day, and many more hours I just can`t remember. So, the figure which would accurately estimate the number of extra days I had put in from the end of September until now should have been closer to 20. Yep - 20 extra days worth of time I worked in 6 weeks. I didn`t care about compensation for this - it was my pleasure, really, as this exchange is pretty much one of the main reasons for my being here. But, they wanted to know, so I told them what I had worked, and they decided to give me an extra 12 days of vacation.
Are you confused yet? Keep in mind that I am having this conversation almost entirely in Japanese!
After grabbing a pen and paper and writing it all down, it turns out that after taking the week after the exchange off, and after taking off almost 3 weeks this Christmas, I will still have 21 days of vacation time to use before next July. This doesn`t include the extra two weeks they`ll give me in the summer to go home. All this from the overtime I have worked this past 6 weeks. Or something like that.
Then the clincher: The Superintendant turns to me and asks, "So, now will you recontract for a third year?"
HUH? I`ve been made to feel like the world`s biggest pain in the butt, and now you are telling me that all this was just a fancy dance to give me what I wanted (and way more)? All I asked for was 2 weeks in the summer to go home if I was to recontract, and now I suddenly have been given that plus almost 20 extra days!
I looked at him and said, "I will talk it over with my family and friends, and let you know after Christmas"
The truth is, I probably will stay. This was my way of getting back at them for making my life so difficult. I cannot make this too easy on them - call me petty, but I need retribution for the aggravation. I know they want me to stay - no, they feel like they NEED me to stay. We have a big demonstration lesson (where all the teachers from the Tajima area, maybe even the prefecture, come to watch us teach a class and then we have to give a lecture on how to teach English) coming up in the fall - this is a huge deal for them. They have chosen the best class to use as an example, and they want Mrs Yamashita and I to teach it because we have a great rapport with each other and with those students. In this ideal circumstance, Ikuno JHS would come off shining. However, Mrs Yamashita is expecting her first child in July and this changes everything. If I do not stay, then this very important demo lesson will be taught by a brand new teacher and a brand new ALT to students with whom they have not yet formed a bond and in fact, barely even know.
What this all means, to those of you still reading this ( You brave souls!) is that by giving me an extra month and a half of vacation (which I will never be able to use this year, and don`t even want - I only wanted 2 weeks - TWO weeks!!!!!), making the grand total for this year 2.5 months of vacation, they will have gotten their wish (that I recontract) and I will have gotten mine (time to go home next summer to see my family and friends).
I still think that it would have been a lot easier if they just would have said "yes" when I first asked them for those 2 weeks. Oh, yes, and I forgot to mention - they still want me to record any overtime I put in because they want to make sure they give me time off in lieu for it! Insane - I do not need/want any more holidays!!!! I must remember that the logic here is *slightly* different from my own.... Welcome to "due process" in Japan!!!
Did I mention that this whole meeting was almost entirely in Japanese? Which brings me back to my original point - the real reason why I can`t bring myself to pick up a book to study for the Japanese Proficiency Test is that I am too exhausted from actually USING Japanese during the day. I guess I figure that if I can get through all this in Japanese, then WHY do I need to look at a book and translate "This is a pen" to prove what level of the language I am capable of? The entire test seems pointless now. The real test is in my daily life.
Puts a whole new spin on my concept of procrastination, doesn`t it?
:)
Sabine
 Sabine . 5:37 PM . Comments
Tuesday, November 26, 2002
Hu Are You Talking To?
Ok, I saw this on my friend`s site (check out Modem Noise) and I laughed so hard - perhaps because I really could envision the conversation taking place. In any case, I stole it from him (thanks, Adrian!) to put here - so that I can laugh again when I check out my site in the future!!! For those of you not in the know, this is based on one of my favourite comedy sketches from eons ago, "Who`s on First".
HU'S ON FIRST
By James Sherman
(We take you now to the Oval Office.)
George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice, here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?
Sabine . 9:10 PM . Comments
Fire in Ikuno
10:45 am - the air raid siren goes off
The P.A. at school starts blaring (we`re attached to some thingy that announces everything that goes on in town). A house is on fire in Shinmachi (my neighbourhood).
The rush of adrenaline flows through my blood, making my heart beat so quickly that I think it will burst forth from my chest. Shinmachi, after all, consists of probably no more than 20 houses or so.
They announce the address - it is 229 - I am 1182 - Phew! However, it turns out that everyone thinks that this is the house of a student here, so a mad panic ensues to try to get the precise information on where the student lives. The homeroom teachers are nowhere to be found - they would have the address memorized.
Adrenaline is still pumping through my veins - this is what happens when one`s family home was burnt down by a fire years ago. I still get a bit panicked when I hear of a house fire - especially if it is too close for comfort - like the fire in Vancouver, and now this one down the road from me.
Fires are extremely dangerous here in Japan, as most houses are built of wood and paper, and very few have more than just a foot or two of space in between them. If there ever was to be a big house fire in this town, I have no doubt that it would rapidly spread and destroy whole blocks, if not the whole town.
Luckily, this fire was put out only 10 minutes after it was announced. Hopefully, there is not much damage. And, hopefully, the student whose home it was will not have to live with the fear of fire that I have acquired as the result of my experience...
:)
Sabine
Sabine . 6:27 PM . Comments
Monday, November 25, 2002
Preposterous Ponderances
To quote my good friend Wordworth (well, I recited a poem of his once in Elementary School)
"For oft when on my couch I lie/ In vacant or in pensive mood/ They flash upon my inner eye/ Which is the bliss of solitude."
10 points to the first person who can guess what poem I recited in grade 6....
Anyhow, as winter is drawing nigh, and I can`t seem to move myself from under my kotatsu (heated table with a duvet thrown over), I am often in "vacant or in pensive mood". Last night, as I was pondering this line, I realized that it should be changed to "In vacant or procrastinative mood". You see, I never have time to be in a pensive mood - I am continually putting off for tomorrow what should be done today. Last night was no exception. I SHOULD have been studying for the Japanese Proficiency Test that I have to take this weekend. However, after having completed 112 sample questions from the Kanji section, and after realizing that I only got 2 wrong (no applause - this is the easiest level for which I only have to know about 100 of the darn things), I decided to procrastinate on the Grammar section. So, I pondered Wordsworth instead.
Today`s procrastination ponderance - for those of you who need some help - comes to me courtesy of Mr Robert Frost:
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry that I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.
:)
Sabine
PS - so far, Adrian is the highest scorer on my quiz!!! Good on ya!
Sabine . 10:30 PM . Comments
Sunday, November 24, 2002
How Much Do You Know About Me
Then again, how much do you really WANT to know???
To take the quiz on me, check this link: Take my Quiz on QuizYourFriends.com!">
Then Click on "Take Your Friend`s Quiz Now"
:)
Sabine . 5:56 PM . Comments
Wednesday, November 20, 2002
Lesson Planning 101
At first it was very exciting to be given the opportunity to teach "Conversation" classes. In these classes, we get to toss aside the textbook and just focus on speaking English. I like to try to make them fun, interesting, and relevant to the students, but it is a real drain on my brain. Once I do one class that the students love, it is then necessary to think of something of the same level or better for the next class. It then becomes a bit of a chore to continually think of something great to do.
Right now, I am working on having the students write and perform their own TV Commercials. I divided them into groups of three, and each group had to choose an item that I brought in, random things like: a yoga video, a hiking stick, mildew remover, instant coffee, bug spray, cough syrup, instant curry, etc.
We watched some commercials from Canada, and they decided what the important information to relay in a commercial was. This ended up working well with the grammar point they have been studying recently. I told them that the most important thing is to make the audience (the rest of the class) want to buy their product. Indeed, they will mark each other on this project- after they present their commercial, the rest of the class will vote on whether or not they`d buy the product based on their presentation. This is because in "real life" there will not be a teacher to grade how well they can communicate. Their peers will be the ones to decide whether sufficient and appropriate information was communicated for them to make a decision to purchase the product the groups are trying to sell.
The students got very excited and creative. I was walking around and watching them do yoga poses while talking about things that are good for your health. One boy acted like a cockroach as the other pretended to spray him - it was like an English Manga (comic)book had come to life. They asked me if they could present their commercials next week, so that they could practise more and bring stuff from home. Then, the Japanese teacher of English decided that we`d videotape the commercials to present next year when we have to do a demonstration lesson and workshop for all of the English teachers in Tajima (the northern part of my prefecture). The kids really got into it, and they are even videotaping Japanese commercials to try to come up with ideas. As long as none of them sings the song from the Nomo Sake commercials, I will be happy (it is by far THE most annoying thing on the TV right now - I HAVE to turn the TV off whenever it comes on).
Suddenly, what was meant to be a simple and fun lesson has turned into a huge production, and I am left to try to find something to do for the following week. I am at a loss. Somehow, I can`t think of anything creative enough to do, even though the theme is "Christmas". If writers can get a case of "writer`s block", then I`ve definitely got a bad case of "Teacher`s Block"!!!
Sabine . 5:56 PM . Comments
Tuesday, November 19, 2002
Busted!
Insert appropriate expletive here: _____________________.
Yes, that was for me. It may come as a shock to those of you who read this regularly, but I started this site with two very noble intentions: the first was to enable my friends and family to remain in touch with my day to day life, and the second was to create for myself something tangible to help me recollect this experience in my later years. Honestly, I didn`t believe that my random musings would be of interest to anyone else! But, here you are, reading this and responding, and it has truly been a great experience for me.
Through this experiment, I have met many people - there are those who are interested in Japan, those who were doing a search on names for their new kittens (the adorable thing ended up being named "Sabine"), those who are studying the experiences of foreigners living abroad, those who are professional writers and wanted to comment on my work.
There were even some people who were looking for more random things and happened upon my site: people looking for girly videos, one person who wanted a "picture of her hands around my neck" (the sicko!), and one poor soul looking to buy bittern.
By whatever methods you arrived at my site, I thank you for your continued support, and I hope I can keep it light-hearted and interesting while still keeping that personal connection to my life here alive.
And I definitely do try to let my heart and my mind show in my words. Sometimes I forget that there is a larger audience out there, and that maybe some of them are interested in more than just the pictures on the site!
What does this mean to you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It is difficult, as a writer, to let people into one`s most intimate thoughts. Today, I discovered that it is easier to let strangers into those thoughts than it is to let the people you care about the most in. Maybe, if I was a professional writer, I would have known this already. However, I am happy that this lesson needed no more tuition than the pain of embarassment. It is important for me to look at these times with a sense of humour, for laughing is probably the one thing that comes most easily to me.
I am the kind of person who hates to be vulnerable. Like other such people, that comes from lessons in the past. What I need is more experiences in making myself vulnerable, and having that be a positive experience (couldn`t we all use that though?!). Maybe this will turn out to be one of those times. Maybe not. I can`t know what the future will bring. I can only hope it contains a lot of laughter - and somehow I know it will!
Yes, this is a mighty cryptic post, isn`t it.... It is meant to be. It is for me to reflect upon when I am sitting in my rocking chair. I am sure that these pains of my youth will then have faded into small pinpricks. Then, you will see a small woman, old and grey with deep laugh lines etched into her cheeks, lean back - as slightly as her arthritis will allow, and let out a great chuckle that will make the earth shudder all around her.
:)
Sabine . 11:00 PM . Comments
Monday, November 18, 2002
I am so Proud.
You all know (if you read this space regularly) that I have been super-busy lately. I`ve barely had time to cook dinner, let alone coach students for a speech contest! Well, today we had the English speech contest for my area and both of my students came in second (there is a recitation section, and a speech section, where the students have to write their own speech content)!!!!!!!!
Basically, I handed Sayaka, our recitation contest participant, a copy of her speech and a tape I recorded for her - she did "The Paper Bag Princess" by Robert Munsch (my favouirite children`s story). Then, I left for Canada and didn`t get to meet with her to practice until last night, when we worked on the different voices and gestures for all the characters.
I interviewed Kanami in the van in Canada (we were on our way to Seattle from Vancouver, a three hour drive) to get the content for her speech. I wrote it down the morning after my friend`s wedding in Calgary and e-mailed it to my teacher who then gave it to her. I recorded a tape for her when I got back to Japan, and then I left to go to a conference. She had tests and such, so she only had one day to work on the speech!
In retrospect, I could have worked and worked with these students on their speeches - making their pronunciation almost perfect and making their presentation theatrical - if time would have allowed for it. However, nothing equals the looks on their faces, and the pride in my heart, from the knowledge that they did it almost entirely on their own. This means so much to me, because it means that they are being reached - they are using what they have learned over the entire course of their English education, and that makes me so proud!!!! A few last minute hours of work before the contest would not have stuck in their minds and in their hearts. This will.
I just want to hug them so hard and let them know how proud I am of them!!!!!
:)
Sabine . 11:31 PM . Comments
Sunday, November 17, 2002
Coming in from the Cold.
Here, the expression, "Coming in from the cold", does not exist. I know, you`ve all heard me gripe about the cold numerous times. I don`t think you quite realize just how cold it gets here though. Well, that`s not quite true - we don`t have the nostril-freezing temperatures of minus 30 that exist in parts of Canada now, but when the thermometer drops down to 0 Celsius, it becomes unbearable.
Why, might you ask? It is simply because there is NO insulation or central heating in homes. So, when it is 0 outside, it is 0 inside. The only bonus for being inside is that there is no wind-chill.
Imagine what you wear outside on a 0 degree day. Now imagine wearing those clothes inside and not wanting to remove them from your body from November to April. Imagine getting up in the morning and going to do your "business", only to steam up the bathroom so much you cannot find the button for "flush".
Perhaps I should describe to you my winter morning ritual.
My alarm goes off, and I reach over to push the `snooze` button. I reach down to turn on the heater beside my bed. In the process, a few fingers become frost-bitten. Quickly, I withdraw my hand and curl up under my duvet (`Duna` for the Aussies). I pull my hat down over my ears (yes, I sleep in wool socks, a toque, mitts and polar-fleece PJ`s) and am thankful that I left the electric blanket on all night. Yes, I am ever the pragmatic Canadian - the wool socks stay on at ALL times!
The alarm goes off again, and I push `snooze` once more. I quickly jump up and turn on the second heater in my beadroom, then run back and turn myself into "Sabine sushi" (Maki style) using my duvet.
After another 10 minutes, I decide to make a run for it. My bedroom is now up to a cozy 7 degrees celsius, so I make a mad dash to the kitchen, where the kerosene heater has warmed the room up to a comfortable 12 degrees. I set the timer on it the night before - a necessary but dangerous task, as there is a slight ( well, maybe not so slight) risk of dying from carbon monoxide poisoning. I crack the window a bit to let in some oxygen, and to get rid of the kerosene smell which has permeated everything.
I also put some water on to boil - to make coffee and heat up the room some more. I turn on my kotatsu - a table with a heating lamp attached on it and a duvet thrown over the top. I curl up under this table, as it is the one thing that becomes warm quickly, and I psych myself up for the next task - taking a shower.
First, I take off my socks, and gingerly step into the shower room. I turn on the hot water, flip it up to the shower position and quickly dart out of there. It is absolutely necessary to let the water run a little bit - otherwise the floor is too cold. The steam heats up the bathroom just enough so that it is bearable to strip down. Let me tell you, if it was effective to take a shower in polar fleece, I would have found a way to do it! Alas, I do not dawdle and hang out in the bathroom naked - every weensy hair on my body sticks up to try to protect me from the cold, so I literally jump in the hot water to warm up. It takes me a few minutes until I can feel my hands well enough to even begin to try to work the bottles and tubes I use as part of my cleansing ritual.
I always get very sad when I have to finally turn off the hot water. For a little while, my bare skin is warm and glowing. I can only hope that my bedroom will have warmed up to at least 10 degrees by the time I get there.
Sigh. Only about 5 months left of this.....
Sabine . 7:05 PM . Comments
Monday, November 11, 2002
Tadaima! I`m Home!
After many trials and tribulations, I have finally returned to Ikuno. It is much colder here than in Vancouver - I am told they had snow already on the weekend.
I made it to Osaka safely, although my luggage went on to Shanghai. Unfortunately, they are not going to send me there to retrieve it - it will be shipped to me this afternoon. The flight took 11 hours, and it took me another 6 to get out of the airport and get back to my apartment. Finally, I arrived to my freezing flat at 10:30PM, or to my head, 5:30am (Vancouver time). Jet lag this way sucks - it is only 10 o`clock and I am ready for dinner.
The worlds of Canada and Japan are so different. When I was in Vancouver, it was difficult remembering that I had even visited Japan. Now that I am here, my trip home seems like it was so long ago. All I`ve done is drink coffee and sleep though!
The excitement is gone, and I feel the need to get into the spirit of Christmas. Perhaps this is just my way of wanting to keep family and friends in my heart a little longer. I think I will get into the festive spirit on the weekend and decorate my place for Christmas. I have visions of playing Christmas CD`s and videos, making egg nog and gingerbread from scratch, and making a nice roast for dinner - complete with Yorkshire puddings and gravy - MMM! By doing this, I will let myself mope and regret that I had such a short visit. Then, I will be able to move forward with my life. That`s kind of one of my motto`s - let yourself mope and be sad, but put a time limit on it. The good times are the memories, and the bad times are just lessons.
Sabine . 5:12 PM . Comments
Saturday, November 09, 2002
Last Day Reflections
Sigh. Here I am, on my last day in Vancouver, faced with the challenge of once again saying "good-bye". I know that there are wonderful reasons for me to go back to Japan, but right now they are not on the forefront of my brain. You see, I am one of those people who commits 100% to whatever I am doing. Whether I am teaching, with my friends, travelling, or doing anything really, all else falls away and I am in the moment. So, now I am here in Vancouver, hanging out with my friends and walking down familiar streets. I am home, 100%. When I go back to Japan, I will be there 100%, and the memories of this trip will be just that - memories. I am just in a state of transition now - preparing to leave here and go back there. I think it is the limbo that is driving me crazy: I cannot give myself over to any place right now. Yet, I feel the strong urge to grow roots somewhere. After having spent 20 Years in Toronto, 7 in Vancouver, 8 months in Australia, and 15 months in Japan, I have to admit that I am tired of wandering for extended periods. I want the white picket fence, dog, and a place to store my backpack until my next, shorter romp.
In any case, I will write the following for no particular audience - it is for me to reflect upon this journey at a later date, when the caffeine jitters have worn off and I can reflect more clearly on my time spent here.
This journey began in a whirlwind. I arrived at the airport and was immediately bombarded by questions - from the teachers fo Ikuno JHS and PW Mini School, by the students, by the customs agents and by myself. The first friend I saw was Scott, who just happened to be working the Customs line at the airport. I wanted to hug him - the first familiar face from home. However, this is not an appropriate thing to do to a Customs official - so we talked under our breath for a few minutes. The rental car was arranged, so off we were to change money at my old place of work - Thomas Cook. The immense fog in my brain prevented me from doing much more than grunting to my old friends. We made tentative plans to meet later.
At the hotel, I was met by one of my best friends, Steve (AKA "Cubicle Dweller"). I rambled off introductions to my Japanese Teachers and went up to my hotel room (downtown, 30th floor, looking out over Stanley Park and the North Shore mountains). I had 15 minutes to recoup before meeting more friends in the lobby. The teachers were shuttled off to Andrew's (PW Mini's Head Teacher) house for dinner. I was off with Steve, Helen, and Karen for some much needed coffee and a manicure. Yes, I can be a girl sometimes - although there was an alternative motive to the manicure - it was the only chance Helen and I had to do our nails before the wedding of our friends the following weekend (we're both bridesmaids in it). Karen joined us in our venture, Steve decided to forego the girly things and he went home. It was great bonding with the gals, though I must admit that I fell asleep in the chair while getting my pedicure. Later we grabbed some sushi and went back up to the hotel room to eat. After that I fell asleep - I had my alarm set for only an hour, but I ended up sleeping through it, the ringing phone, and my teachers knocking on my door to wake me. Finally, I woke up at 10pm and was met by a friend to go for dinner - Lamb Souvlaki. I slept so soundly that night!
The rest of the week was a blur of English, Japanese, meeting people, touring around to all the spots I forgot about, and relearning how to drive on the right side of the road. We went to dinner parties, to Stanley Park, Granville Island, the Aquarium, Lynn Canyon for a hike, up Grouse mountain, shopping, to the Keg, to our second sister school, to Steveston, a hockey game, to Watermania, and of course to Seattle. The highlight for me was Hallowe'en - the only time that week that I saw my friends other than the Saturday that I arrived. The teachers who came with me had a blast - looking at all the people and costumes and getting to know my friends. Oh yes, and the fireworks that decided to shoot off sideways and smack poor Keith in the butt.... Never laughed so hard in my life!
Then on Saturday morning, I left the hotel at 5:30 am for the airport. The other teachers and students would be flying out later to go back to Japan, but I had to go to my friend's wedding in Calgary. The plane was delayed by 2 hours which caused quite a stir for poor Tracey (the bride). Needless to say, I arrived and had just enough time to do my own hair and makeup (I had long since missed my appointments), throw on my dress and head off to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. It was a beautiful, romantic, small wedding. The men were in Kilts, and half of the ceremony was in French (the groom's family is French Canadian and the bride's is Scottish). The reception was a blast, and I revelled in the fact that I could let my hair down finally and relax a little.
We got home at 3, slept till 8am and immediately started running around to cook and clean for the present-opening. I felt so bad - this was my first time in Tracey and Yan's new house, and they weren't even there - I had to poke and prod in their cupboards all on my own. After feeding and entertaining about 20 people for the afternoon and evening, we all flopped on the couch and ordered pizza - the wedding was over and we could all relax. I was to leave the next day to go back to Vancouver, so we had about 24 hours to catch up. It was great seeing them all again - it was very sad to leave, but I know that they are at the beginning of a wonderful life together. I hope that one day, I can have that kind of a relationship with someone - I really admire theirs!!!!
Back in Vancouver for only 5 days, I immediately focussed on meeting up with my long-lost friends. It is all a blur of martinis and friends, easy conversations and pictures. Basically, not so much has changed. Every meeting would start the same: with a tentative, fearful look at each other, wondering if too much has changed and if there is still a friendship there. It was very comforting to discover that my friends are all still the same people - only the circumstances have changed. Soon, conversation was flowing easily - perhaps a little too easily, as it felt like I had never left for Japan in the first place.
The second week, it seems that all I did was shop, eat, drink and talk with friends. We went to favourite restaurants and they re-introduced me to popular culture here (I even got to see Eminem act!). Oh, yes, and I went to the dentist ( I have never had a cavity before, and suddenly I have two that are coming in! My dentist, who is Japanese, is convinced that it is because all that white rice is broken down just like sugar - the acids are eating away my enamel. Interesting.) I also went to the doctor for a full exam, and I am happy to report that I have lost 10 pounds and am completely healthy. I went to the travel medical clinic and got vaccinated against Typhoid and Hepatitis and got anti-malrials and other stuff for my trip to Nepal in the spring.
Tonight, we are going out to Samba - a brazilian "chophouse". That will be a first for me!!! I'll be very happy to give my friends a last hug though!
Now I am sitting here wondering where the time went. I really wish that I had another week to spend with my friends! Next summer seems so far away!!!!! Yet, I know that once I get back to Japan, time will fly so quickly and I will find many things to get excited about.
I can't wait to unpack my suitcase!
Talk to y'all next time - from Japan!!!
:)
Sabine . 12:45 PM . Comments
Friday, November 08, 2002
The Sign
Here I was, sleeping on my friend's couch having a bit of a nightmare: I was at the local Sushi-go-Round, but the sushi was going by too fast for me to take any off! Don't ask me what it means, ask Jung.
All of a sudden, there were alarms happening outside the restaurant and shouts of burly men echoed in the entranceway. I realized that this was not part of my dream so I woke up.
I see flashing lights reflected through the blinds of the apartment, and a big orange glow. I move the blinds a crack and peer outside. The house across the street is engulfed in flames, and there are two fire trucks pummelling it with water. Time check: 3am. Now, most of the fire is out, they are just trying to put out the back of the house and the roof (honestly, the front looks all but untouched - well, except where the roof caved in...).
What a surreal thing to watch in the middle of the night. The vision is perfectly framed by the window panes, as if it is a TV show for me to watch. My friend hasn't woken up, despite all the racket. I look at the windows of other houses and apartments, and no one else seems to have seen it either! Actually - other than the firefigters and police - no one is around the house at all. I hope its residents are OK...
What does this mean to me ? Is this a dream? Is this a sign? I have to ponder these thoughts, especially since I have been wondering about the meaning of "home" to me, and now I am awakened by a house on fire.
Maybe I will save all these thoughts for my morning coffee.... It is now 3:30am and I am probably not making any sense.
Sabine . 3:36 AM . Comments
Thursday, November 07, 2002
My Morning Coffee 2
Sigh. I am home, but I have no home here. I am crashing on a friend's couch and trying to make sense of the word and concept of home. When I shut my eyes and think of where I call home, my apartment in Ikuno pops to mind. However, when I walk down the streets of Vancouver, I finally feel like I am home - I may not have a house here, but it is still the most familiar and comfortable town I've known. Then there is Toronto (well, Newmarket) - where I was born and raised and spent the first 20 years of my life. When I think of family, Toronto is what I think of.
Where is home when one has put down roots in many lands? Can I ever really go anywhere when I feel as though I am always returning? How is it that when I see my friends, it is like I have never been away?
I love to travel, and to live in new and interesting places, but every time I go somewhere, I leave a piece of myself behind there. Is there enough of me to continue this pattern, or am I destined to have my heart broken again and again because I am always leaving. I am learning to live with the knowledge that every time I go an an extended trip, I lose more people in my life. They just disappear - I am out of their sight, and out of their minds. I have been forgotten and remembered more times than I care to think of. And it's tearing me apart.
And now, I need to decide if I am going to stay in Japan for one last year, or if I should return home (whichever one I may choose) to settle. I don't know - there are so many factors to consider.
I am open to suggestion.
Sabine . 10:22 AM . Comments
Wednesday, November 06, 2002
My Morning Coffee
Here I am, sitting in Cubicle Dweller's apartment drinking my morning coffee and contemplating my navel. Yes, the secret is out - this is my favourite thing to do on a day off. It is easy, it is cheap, and it is my way of processing all that goes on in my hectic life. The only requirements for such a morning are a pot of coffee, comfortable pajamas, and my brain. I will now let you into my world even further and tell you what thoughts have been going through my mind:
I cannot believe that I had to help my principal with his enema issue. Yes, constipation took its hold of all the teachers on the trip, but it was my principal who asked me to take him to the drugstore to find an enema. Since the Japanese for enema has never come up in conversation, he had to resort to demonstrating to me what the problem was and what he needed to solve it. So there we were in the middle of the drugstore, him gesticulating madly (including great sound effects: "UUUUuuurrrph....pop....patong" ) over an imaginary toilet, and me, trying to hide in the vitamin aisle ("Wow! Echinacea's on sale!"). Alas, the poor pharmacist couldn't understand the gesticulations of this crazy man so I was left to translate.
Needless to say, the medicine worked, as he gesticulated to me at the restaurant the next morning the intestinal explosions which occurred the previous evening. Why does this fascinate me so much that it still occupies my thoughts? I think it is because I have seen such shyness over everything remotely personal, that to spend the last three days of my trip with the teachers and students talking about bowel movements shocked my usually quite liberal sensibilities. One cannot talk about love or sex or kissing or hugging or fighting or any of that stuff - but man, bowel movements are fair game. The real question is:
Why are conversations about bowel movements any more natural or comfortable than the other topics? The lack of emotional attachment to the subject is my guess. Also the fact that there is little individuality expressed in a bowel movement. I don't know, but I am curious about how we are socialized to accept certain things, and dismiss others.
Any thoughts???
Sabine . 9:03 AM . Comments
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